I think when people are ultra-positive and have
this incomparably sunny disposition toward the world, I get turned off. There’s
a lot of stuff out there which attempts to make you feel inspired, but ends up
leaving you feeling ashamed for being human. It would be easy for me to say:
“Everything happens for a reason!”
“Life is an adventure!”
“Love solves everything!”
“Happiness is a choice!”
These are easy words to say. Easy things to think.
Easy, easy, easy. But, their meanings dry up the moment life happens.
Everybody might have spent far too many nights
feeling ashamed that they couldn’t be more positive, happier, better, stronger.
Many would look at those shiny people plastered with positivity and wonder
where did they go wrong. Why were they so affected by the world? Why didn’t
every day feel like an adventure to them? Don’t these people have to pay bills
and have uncomfortable conversations and wake up sometimes with a headache and
an axe to grind? Why were they seemingly the only one so deeply affected by the
human experience?
Inspiration is cheap. It’s easy. It’s flowery.
It’s drenched in promises no one can fulfil.
What is actually needed is that someone would
understand us and make us feel that our weird and twisty and dark thoughts and
fears and feelings are not unique to one only. Nobody needs someone negating
ones experience in order to provide with sweet words fluffy as clouds — and
just as transparent.
You get tired of people trying to inspire to
have a better, bigger, happier life. We need less fake inspiration in this world
and more realness. Less doomsday. Less fake happiness. More real shit.
Less preaching. More storytelling. Less advice.
More community.
I wish people would stop trying to perfect other’s
life. Everybody is selling the magic pill to happiness.
What you should know is that you don’t need to fix
yourself if you’re not smiling every moment of the day. Sometimes you have very
little to be grateful for and that’s okay. Sometimes it’s hard to muster up the
energy to be happy with what you have when you want so much more from the world
and yourself. That’s okay. It’s okay to be angry and to be kind of dark and
weird and not a ball of positivity every moment. Sometimes it’s okay to be
bored and to think that happiness is a bit boring because it kind of is.
Sometimes it’s fine to be moody and sad and
contemplative and to solve problems with a glass of wine or a pizza, it’s okay
to just not have it all figured out, to have no answers, to just be like, what
is the point of anything.
It is okay to feel like the ground is shaking
beneath your feet. It’s okay because everything is temporary. You can lose your
footing one day and be on top of the world the next. Things can change in a blink.
Happiness is as fleeting as anything else. These fake salespeople who act like
they have the cure to being human really grind me up.
Just promise me that
the last thing you’ll do is be ashamed of where you’re at in your experience of
being a human. Nothing good comes from shame. It’s about the lowest vibration
place you could be operating from. Avoid shame and anything or anyone that
causes you shame. Get it all the hell out of your energy field. Shame is not
going to motivate you. It’s going to drain you.
If there’s one promise you can make for yourself,
let it be this: I will not let myself be ashamed of my unique experience of
being human. Forget the positive bullshit: that promise, that mantra, that
state of mind is what can really change lives. A person incapable of cowering
to shame is a hero — considering all the many reasons our world gives us reasons
to be ashamed. To forgo the feeling of shame is an act of radical resistance.
