Most women tend to have “rape anxiety” in
public. Many of us might not understand this concept, so here I try to explain
some feelings and thoughts which can be termed as rape anxiety.
Sometimes, if a woman is walking alone on a deserted
path, she may worry that she might get raped. That anxiety can even happen in
more low-risk situations, like even walking to work in broad daylight or even
when someone rolls down the window of their car to shout something about our
bodies.
So now most of you still won’t have any idea about
it but a woman experiences this fundamental truth every day. This feeling is
shared, to some degree, with most women (and other marginalised people who are
threatened in public spaces).
So to all guys out there, you might
unintentionally make your counterparts nervous by just being around them in a
weird way. It may be uncomfortable to start talking
about sexual violence and harassment, but it's so, so necessary for all of us and
the most important thing is that a guy should be aware about what his female
friend wants him to do when she talks of sexual harassment and violence.
1.
Listen very
carefully
It is very important to listen to a female when she speaks be it about
whichever topic she talks about (Just listen to avoid pissing her off). Keeping
jokes aside and coming to the point, whenever a girl wishes to discuss a
sensitive issue with you remember that she trusts you and she confides in you,
please be generous and make your ears available for her words. She might just
want you to listen and if you have your opinion regarding the issue please put
it forth because this might change her view of the world and it too can affect
your thinking process as well.
2.
Be aware of
your behaviour
It is not always true that if a women looks at you she might be
interested in you, maybe she is just glancing at you to make sure that you aren’t
a threat. You need to understand the hint that a women is trying to avoid you.
Most of the times you are harmful to the opposite gender but maybe your body
language and behaviour might drops signals that a woman will perceive to be
incorrect. So make sure you are a gentleman.
3.
Use your privilege
as a shield
The perpetrators of gendered micro aggression, sexual harassment, and
sexual violence aren't strangers — they're the men in your classes, your
workplace, your gym and all areas of society. So if you see something wrong happening, please make
a move and say something because if you won’t, nobody will. And PLEASE teach
your sons, brothers, and friends to do the same.
